sexuality.

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 21:40:43 GMT

lately... i've noticed that when i am around women I can't stop looking at them... I check them out to the point that i get caught looking at them. when i get caught my heart jumps and i feel nervous and turned on at the same time. I have never gone up to a girl before... but I would really like to... I have seen this one girl a few times at my school and there is something about her that i am drawn to. I am afraid that if i go up to her and get talking to her... that i am going to a) be turned down by her, b) find out she is not interested in women and leave feeling incredibly "awkward". I dont even know her name... and yet I cant stop thinking about how badly i want to talk to her.
I dont have much experience with dating women... so my confidence in that field is not to great... but at the same time i feel more confident then i ever have with men.
looking over my past i realize that i have alway like women but was too afraid of what everyone else would think about me.... so i tried to hide it from everyone and as a result i suffered from it.
I am feeling more comfortable with my sexuality now a days... but i am struggling with the idea of opening up to my close friends... I debate back and forth about opening up or keeing it silenced. I am afraid that if i tell them... they will be creeped out by it and not want to hang out with me anymore... i certainly hope that never happens but how am i to know if it will or not?
Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....
i am also afraid that i wont ever find another woman who is interested in women...

Freedom

sexuality.